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And when the slightly overweight woman shows up on a date with a man who was expecting “athletic”, both parties are in for a night of disappointment. First of all, I think that’s a problem that’s more in your head than in reality. Still, no matter how much rebranding we do, life is still not going to be fair.

Men are still largely going to prefer young, thin women.

Finally, the last myth we’re gonna bust is that there’s something about your profile that’s attracting the wrong kind of men.

I swear to God, I have heard this complaint every single day for nearly a decade. So let’s play the game I play with my clients on the phone:: Then why would you expect the percentage to be any higher online?

The good news, Nicci, is that all of the answers can be derived from the same exact technique — flipping things over to consider the other person’s point of view.

Let’s start with you, because a) you wrote me the note, and b) you’re an online dating anomaly — an honest size 10 who doesn’t claim to be athletic and toned.

All we can do is tackle this confidently, and not get too thrown by the many bumps in the road.

And few people face more discrimination than women in their 50’s and 60’s, who only seem to get email from men who are MUCH older. This is the explanation for why women don’t tell the truth about their bodies.

Most of these people are good people — and yet they give in to the temptation to lie. Simply put, there’s very little reward for having integrity.

If I’m a 5’4” man, I know that it’s going to be hard to get a date if I tell the truth.

If I’m a 50-year-old man who makes less than ,000/year, I’m going to be somewhat handicapped.

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